tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post8913508295856236023..comments2023-11-03T03:27:33.205-04:00Comments on Create Beauty Daily: Setting It DownCameronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18261631036924864088noreply@blogger.comBlogger78125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-78072021872013020052011-03-06T00:43:32.627-05:002011-03-06T00:43:32.627-05:00Just read this now. Thinking of you and sending lo...Just read this now. Thinking of you and sending lots of love and prayers.Janinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09463316446074438117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-91910799528418364772011-01-20T14:10:59.784-05:002011-01-20T14:10:59.784-05:00Amazing post. Feeling very inspired with the idea ...Amazing post. Feeling very inspired with the idea of putting a burden down, and thereby allowing others in.<br /><br />Rooting for you,<br /><br />AnnAnnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03415593419139450655noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-7652992417366024352010-10-20T02:11:36.397-04:002010-10-20T02:11:36.397-04:00Dear Cam your post here is very moving; moving bec...Dear Cam your post here is very moving; moving because even if I am not in your shoes, I know the pain that both Jason and you felt/feeling as I am no stranger in this dept even though it was not the pain you and Jason are going through and even though my Mother-in-law passed away in 1988, the pain is so deep rooted that I wish it would Go Away ENTIRELY but it never does. Everyone has some kind of pain and it is how we handle same. Probably the pain is still deep rooted in the recess of my mind is because, like you I kept it all inside of me and prob only my mum and aunty knew about it then, as Loving my husband, he is a wonderful husband, I never exorcise it because I loved him too much and didnt want to hurt him thinking that I am strong and can handle same but instead in a weird way I must have nutured it. I always told him not to fight my battles with her as she wont take too kindly to any Interference from anyone and she could NEVER tolerate anyone to answer her back when she voice anything so much so that was precisely what I did cos if I were to answer that eg "No, it was not me ...." the record would be Louder and LONGER so I always held my piece. Pse dont get me wrong. My MIL is a very loving mother to her children and grand children, my husband being the eldest and prob that is a partial reason as not easy being 2nd in yr son's life when you were the first woman the son loved. I rem there was once when she woke up at 6.30 a.m. and started her shindig; accusing me of BEING a nosey parker and reading her son in law's will as she found it not staked prop in her drawer as she is a neat freak. My father in law and myself worked in a law firm and he prep the will for my brother in law to sign. I got up from bed, disoriented and this was one of the occasions when I told her that I didnt. Why the hell would I want to read it when I have typed more wills in my life. When I told her that I did not do it, all hell broke loose. She then ranted on and on saying this and that and saying which culmulated with her saying that "If I dont listen to her [ie dont answer her back AT ALL] the lightening will strike me and if it does not strike me then it will stike my kids." When I heard that my dam broke loose; all my emotions came to the fore cos why is she cursing my kids, Who ARE her grand children and INNOCENT BYSTANDERS. That was the straw the broke the camel's back but I kept my silence and then went to work and at work I have always displayed myself like a joker, joking around even though I am so broked up inside;, NEVER once did I became a fighter at work just the reverse I was more understanding esp those who suffered some kind of plight; taking refuge in being in advisory position & trembling with fear Always when the time comes for me to go home, I lived with my inlaws for 13 yrs till her death. Then when I went back, she apologised to me as her younger son witnessed the signature of her son in law and didnt fold it properly when he kept in the drawer. WHY didnt she check all this before; why make an innocent party lived thru all this suffering for Nothing??? And this was the 1st time she ever apologised to me maybe she regretted cursing the kids or me, who knows? One thing positive that all this taught me was it Made me more Patient, Loving. I turned to baking to give me substance and I m glad I did that cos after retiring 6 yrs ago, I hv a small cottage industry. You will definitely be in my prayer list and I pray that one day SOON yr dreams will come true. Mine came thru when I was able to put my passion into cakes that my customers cant get enuf, haha. God bless you gir. If you ever want to check me out, go to face book. My name is Juanita Samson. The photo there would be of my husband at the front and I m slightly behind. God bless you.House of Ophelia, Kamtunhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11970710439667308510noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-6741020527094180282010-10-19T21:25:22.575-04:002010-10-19T21:25:22.575-04:00Dearest sweet Cameron, it's my first time visi...Dearest sweet Cameron, it's my first time visiting. This is so beautifully written and it made my eyes misty. I am so so sorry that you and your love one have to go through so much. I only wish and pray that one day it will happen for you and you love one. <br />I'm inspired by your courage and strength. You are amazing and you are loved. Have a lovely merry happy birthday celebration and love to you!jacquelinehttp://www.jqlinesocuteithurts.typepad.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-41821686338947654122010-10-11T23:12:02.746-04:002010-10-11T23:12:02.746-04:00Okay.
I've read this post maybe a handful of ...Okay.<br /><br />I've read this post maybe a handful of times and each time I don't feel like I have the "right words" and then I suddenly feel guilty for anything I may have complained about on Twitter.<br /><br />So here goes.<br /><br />You are AMAZING. I only know you in 140 character increments but you are an AMAZING woman and I feel like I can call you a friend. It takes guts to write this and I can empathize with laying it out there. I recently wrote about my issues with my dad. Hardest thing to write.<br /><br />Ever.<br /><br />You WILL be a mom one day. I feel it in my bones and in my soul. And I will be here to jump up and down and cry happy tears.<br /><br />Anytime you need a shoulder or an ear, I'm around. Email me, tweet at me, Facebook, phone...anything. I'm your girl and I'm in your corner.<br /><br />Always.<br /><br />I heart you, sweet amazing lady.<br /><br />So fiercely.Tristinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16555268553894040716noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-77831107806493009102010-07-10T10:26:54.393-04:002010-07-10T10:26:54.393-04:00I just prayed for you. I pray that God will give y...I just prayed for you. I pray that God will give you just the right baby at just the right time. When someone wants to be a Mommy there is always a way. And sometimes, the way that it works out is so different than what we are imagining but SO much better.<br /><br />God bless.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07874897254332872367noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-65344664154166057152010-06-01T18:06:12.075-04:002010-06-01T18:06:12.075-04:00Found your blog through O My Family. Beautifully w...Found your blog through O My Family. Beautifully written post. I'm so sorry to hear about your struggle. I'll be praying for you and I was very glad to see that you and your husband are still going strong and really supporting each other. He sounds like an amazing man!<br /><br />I wish you all the best, and don't let that pebble of hope get covered up! :) I have a friend that had fertility issues(Don't worry, I'm not going to get into advice on what to do!) and she has 2 children now using a fertility doctor. I think she had to get some sort of shots for each one in order to get pregnant, not exactly sure on all the details.<br /><br />But anyway, as you already know, there's still hope!The Mom Venture Bloghttp://www.mom-venture.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-73670963828337118812010-05-22T15:37:18.249-04:002010-05-22T15:37:18.249-04:00Blessings come in all sorts of packages. May you ...Blessings come in all sorts of packages. May you enjoy your many others while you wait, heart open, for this one.Pamela Janehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11881149950159521132noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-59617345039555161212010-05-08T23:48:54.294-04:002010-05-08T23:48:54.294-04:00I never saw your blog before today. I have no comm...I never saw your blog before today. I have no comments from the ground or anywhere else. What can one person say to another going through a dark passage? Just that breathing is sometimes all we can do. Your story will inspire someone, it will comfort someone, it will challenge someone. It will travel farther and longer and wider than you could ever dream. With this post, you created a different kind art -- human art. <br />As an older woman who has seen much and experienced much, thank you.Sunny -- aka Matriarchhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12343919025257403465noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-33105266503067107042010-04-04T14:49:00.725-04:002010-04-04T14:49:00.725-04:00I'm sending the biggest hugs ever across the o...I'm sending the biggest hugs ever across the ocean for you. I hope that writing and sharing have really helped you in this emotional experience. I can't change things, but I can admire you and hope for you and believe. Your friend Andrea sounds like a beautiful, wise friend.<br />KatieKatie @ makingthishome.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08720106984004009369noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-66091368537640909842010-04-03T17:18:49.694-04:002010-04-03T17:18:49.694-04:00This is my first time on your blog, thinking of yo...This is my first time on your blog, thinking of you today and sending prayers your way.Marcelahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04702257157855111425noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-57157179915307656962010-03-23T20:46:29.841-04:002010-03-23T20:46:29.841-04:00Cam...you have touched me in a way that no one eve...Cam...you have touched me in a way that no one ever will! I am crying and my heart hurts for what you are going through! Thank you for sharing and for making me look at my blessings for just what they are...blessings! I'm sorry for you and Jason and hope that everything works out! You are an amazing person!<br /><br />KristaKrista Sigsworthnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-14542469297353851462010-03-23T19:36:22.217-04:002010-03-23T19:36:22.217-04:00This was one of the most amazing blogs I've ev...This was one of the most amazing blogs I've ever read. It's like you pulled some thoughts right out of my own head. We've been trying five years and I wish I had never mentioned the time to people but it's too late the cats out of the bag and I know what it's like to be filed away. I know what's it's like to hear your best friend is pregnant and to be so happy for her one moment but then not want to get out of bed for a week because you are so sad for yourself. Hang on to your hope!Danihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12070719218261933878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-79831535474044276252010-03-21T18:14:52.764-04:002010-03-21T18:14:52.764-04:00I got an e-mail from a friend of mine that said yo...I got an e-mail from a friend of mine that said your post reminded her of me. I've never been to your site before and I apologize if my comment is over zealous for a first time visitor.<br /> I'm sorry that you've joined this ever growing, hard, never seems to get easier, club. No ones journey is exactly the same, but for me it has been a huge help to find others in similar situations. Those that know the self hatred feeling when you can't be as exstatic as you want to be for your friends pregnancy announcement. Or for how absolutely devestating another negative pregnancy test can be. <br /> When/ if you're ready, there's a whole community of us on your tightrope willing to welcome you with open arms. <br /><br />I'm praying for you to find strength, courage, peace, and most of all that your hope can be unburied. Good luck!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14706193514488838249noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-4112268059730104502010-03-20T16:12:51.814-04:002010-03-20T16:12:51.814-04:00Cameron...now that you and Jason have set your bur...Cameron...now that you and Jason have set your burden out in front for all to share I see an amazing woman that I cannot wait to meet in May (Inspired 2010). Enjoy Puerto Rico...and Happy Anniversary by the way Cameron. Your heart is huge and holds much love...Anniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18167792810200107106noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-55392289251183494602010-03-18T18:20:20.266-04:002010-03-18T18:20:20.266-04:00This is such sweet heartache. I know the pain of l...This is such sweet heartache. I know the pain of loss, I wish I could take it all away. From all of us.<br /><br />xoxoTo Think is to Createhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07991324171850357891noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-30526046398807287962010-03-18T18:11:50.135-04:002010-03-18T18:11:50.135-04:00You are SO brave, and I wish you all the best.You are SO brave, and I wish you all the best.Becca @ My Crazy Good Lifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10383257003114873569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-72594075776525778612010-03-18T17:57:08.619-04:002010-03-18T17:57:08.619-04:00Cameron, this is a beautiful, beautiful post. You ...Cameron, this is a beautiful, beautiful post. You write so eloquently and poetically. Thank you for being brave enough to share your heart, your experience, your pain. <br /><br />I linked to this post on my blog and I am sure I will be passing it on to many, many friends.<br /><br />stephanie@metropolitanmama.netStephaniehttp://metropolitanmama.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-4671203113179166612010-03-18T10:03:29.657-04:002010-03-18T10:03:29.657-04:00praying for you both.praying for you both.June (a.k.a. "Junebug", Junie June", "Junabell"...https://www.blogger.com/profile/12233426786477740501noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-39542967451397372492010-03-18T02:01:34.532-04:002010-03-18T02:01:34.532-04:00If I could I would send you one of the beautiful ...If I could I would send you one of the beautiful Oregon sunrises and some of the clean, crisp air that smells of fresh evergreen trees after a rainfall. It is good sometimes to just "be". Your honesty and courage to set this down touched my heart. I will lift you and your husband up in prayer, that you will have a peace about all things. Safe travels and know that you are being surrounded with love and prayers. <br />MelissaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-53499624585075264442010-03-17T20:02:51.012-04:002010-03-17T20:02:51.012-04:00What is brave about your post is that sometimes it...What is brave about your post is that sometimes it's easier to not say something "out loud" - like maybe it isn't real that way. You have made it very real and that can be scary, but you will benefit from knowing so many people care about you. By not reaching out you were depriving yourself of that gift. I wish you all the best in your journey and although I don't pray, I will think of you often.Becky Guyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05013869414071923481noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-17629323171900121212010-03-17T12:56:33.282-04:002010-03-17T12:56:33.282-04:00First time reader - linked to you from Metropolita...First time reader - linked to you from Metropolitan Mama.... <br /><br />never dealt with infertility - haven't been on that tightrope - but I do know the heart wrenching anguish of miscarriage... I have no great answers, and won't pretend to... however, I will be praying - and I do know that the best thing for me after the miscarriage was not the answers, or attempts at answers - it was the hugs, prayers, and love of those who know me best... and those that continued to invite me to my normal life regardless of everything else... I pray you are SURROUNDED by THOSE people!Juliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05106072219567919432noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-44084851281919941682010-03-17T11:42:11.059-04:002010-03-17T11:42:11.059-04:00Notes from another Tightrope walker.
I use to thin...Notes from another Tightrope walker.<br />I use to think that the answer to all the heartache and depression would be resolved when I had a baby. The baby was the solution. Then I met a friend who was way worse off (with the depression) then me who was struggling with infertility after having one baby so easily. I remember thinking she should be grateful for the one she’s got. Then I realize the baby is not the solution. I had to come to peace with the situation, or it was going to ruin me. I started working on the underlying feelings that come with infertility. For me they were fears that God didn’t answer prayers, or that I was unworthy of being a mother. (I’m not sure if you are religious, but by your plea for others to pray for you I assume you are). <br />In the bible the story of Hannah and Samuel brought a lot of peace to me. When Hannah got pregnant the KJV reads “and the Lord remembered her.” At first this killed me because since I wasn’t pregnant it made me feel as if God had forgotten me. But then I remembered all the ways He had remembered me. Or all the things I am able to do now because I don’t have a baby. Things that I’d willingly give up, but nevertheless were making me a better person. I realized that God does here our prayers He is mindful of us and of me individually. He answers prayers in His way and in His time. For me I felt that this was a trial of my faith and I grew in my faith as I held firm to it.<br />My second fear was overcome by realizing that worthiness in God eyes had nothing to do with it. That is obvious by all the aborted babies, or by my cousin who smoked marijuana during her pregnancy because it “calmed the baby down so it wouldn’t move so much.” How could any of these women be more worthy of a pregnancy than me? The truth is that we live in an imperfect world and life isn’t fair. It’s not me who did anything wrong. It’s just the way it is. <br />I don’t know if any of this helps or not. Just know you are not alone. There are tons of women out there walking this rope with you. And if they can’t help God can. He can carry your whole boulder and bring you peace in your life even without baby. I came to that peace and held on to my hope for a full year before I got pregnant (took me 4 years with no diagnoses every Dr told me there was nothing “wrong”). Now I have 3 beautiful daughters (5, 3, and 2) and 2 sweet angels waiting for me in Heaven both lost at 12 weeks in the last year. I’m off next week to revisit the infertility docs for the first time in 6 years. Has it been hard the second time around? Of course. Like you said it doesn’t matter how long you have been trying it is something you want and don’t have and that is devastating. But it is easier because I know that God is mindful of me, and I feel that He is sorry that I have to go through this again but that is part of being human.Katyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07442513976108009048noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-55546384182715120572010-03-17T03:58:36.254-04:002010-03-17T03:58:36.254-04:00I love that you've been able to express so bea...I love that you've been able to express so beautifully such an incredibly personal and painful thing. I just followed a link to your blog, so this is my first time here. But I am all too familiar with many of the feelings you describe.<br /><br />I chuckled a little at your description of how hard it is to see a pregnant woman or walk past the baby section at Target, because those were two of the very hardest things for me when my husband and I were going through infertility.<br /><br />I think it would have helped me at that time to recognize that many of those angelic little babies (and the tiny terrors too) came to their parents after painful experiences with infertility and miscarriage. I think I assumed that anyone with children had come by them easily (just like my Mom and sister had), and that I was the only one that knew the pain of not getting pregnant over and over and over....<br /><br />I have one of each now, an angel and a terror, who both became mine through the miracle of adoption. And now I look back on those tough times and I wouldn't trade any of it. Those experiences brought these two kids to me, and I KNOW that they were meant to be mine. And I am a better mother than I would have been otherwise, because I had to work so hard to get them.<br /><br />You are entitled to the pain and grief and all the other emotions you are experiencing. But hold onto that little bit of hope, as hard as that might be at times. Because if being a mother and a father are what you and your husband really want, you will find a way to make it happen.<br /><br />I only have two pieces of advice from "the ground." First is for you and your husband to communicate with each other what you are feeling as you're feeling it. I was open to adoption for months before my husband got to that point. Sometimes I would feel impatient with him, but most of the time it was okay, because we would talk about it. Second, don't be afraid to stand up for yourself. I still regret that I didn't say anything to my uncle who gave me a lecture about not waiting to have children, and that having kids right away after he and my aunt were married was the best thing he ever did. He didn't know that I was going through infertility, but he had a son and daughter-in-law that had gone through nearly the same thing not long before us. He really should have been more sensitive. Sometimes the most well-meaning people say the most wrong things.Beccahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16450988901903787288noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2218631214688838128.post-72403668365959854642010-03-15T15:40:02.285-04:002010-03-15T15:40:02.285-04:00This is Carri. I came to you as a stranger, until ...This is Carri. I came to you as a stranger, until I just read your post. I found out (and you shared your blog) when I emailed you about your beautiful "Three Little Birds" necklace that I chose to memorialize the three miscarriages I have had. The third, just days ago at 11 weeks, still has a reeling. And after reading your blog post, I feel so connected to you and to your pain. It's something that (as you said much better than I can) no one can understand unless they've walked that tightrope themselves. I am so sorry that you have suffered. And you are so brave for sharing your story. We also chose to share our story on our blog, although it was a difficult decision to let people help us. I too have been overwhelmed by the stories of people who I thought I knew who have suffered great losses and also struggled with infertility. It's just something that doesn't get talked about. So thanks again for sharing your thoughts. I really love you "Do's" and "Don'ts". I sent a similar email to my family and I'm amazed at how similar our lists are. <br />I wish I had something to say that could instantly make everything better, but I know that such a thing doesn't exist. Instead, hold firm to all the people who love you (which is very obvious by all the comments here) and don't give up hope. Be gentle with yourself. And thanks for sharing your beautiful work and your story. I can't wait to receive my necklace. It will mean even more to me, now knowing that it was made by hands that understand why I bought it in the first place. <br />If you'd like to see the tribute to our loss, our blog is www.threeschneiders.blogspot.com<br />We have a 2 1/2 year old daughter that I never thought we would have. And you will have your child/ren too. <br /><br />Take care.<br />CarriAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00146460685508539070noreply@blogger.com